I’ve noticed something interesting with my month long lack of scale experiment. I’ve noticed that I have become far more lenient on myself over the weekend. Before, since I weighed myself on Fridays, I would go into the weekend knowing exactly what i weighed and I would use the scale to keep myself from extravagances.
If my weight loss was good I would remind myself of how much work it took to make it good. If it was not a loss I would tell myself I couldn’t justify an indulgent treat. without that mental not, that visual confirmation, I’ve noticed I’ve been justifying more treats for myself on the weekend than usual. I am also a little lax about marking down calories on the weekend.
This has started to make me feel as though I need to work extra hard on Mondays to make certain that I make up for the weekend. I have to say, I don’t like the feeling of starting the week feeling like I need to make up ground.
To be honest it gives me a little bit of anxiety.
I started this month without a scale as a sort of nod to a family member who has struggled and is struggling with an eating disorder. While I am losing weight to get healthy she is dealing with weight and health from the opposite end of the spectrum. Both of us have issues with the scale. she challenged me to go without the scale for a month so that is what I am doing.
What I’ve learned thus far is that while I like listening to my body and assessing how I feel, the scale actually takes a bit of stress off me. I like using it as a tool. I have hit several plateaus in my weight loss journey and the scale is more of sign post than a strict monitoring system. It is sort of a voice to say, yeah, what you are doing is working or maybe ‘I think it might be time to shake things up again’.
I find this a very strange thing to realize. When I first got on the scale at the beginning of this plan I was quite frankly terrified of the scale and what it would tell me. while I will probably never consider it a friend, using it as a tool helps keep my anxiety in check. This is the last week where Friday will have no official scale weigh in. My first weigh in will be September 25th. I think that the change that i will be making to my weigh ins moving forward is I will not be putting a goal weight on the statistics. While I chose the goal number because it was within the range my doctor gave me, I think having it there does put too much emphasis on the number. So once I start using the scale as a tool again, I will just continue my journey until I believe my body is healthy and feels good, not aiming for a specific number.
I know everyone has different weight/health issues in their world, both their own and those of their loved ones. Each body is different and needs to be understood on it’s own, but there are times when we tangle with others. As the saying goes, no man is an island. More than anything else, this month has taught me how I think about certain things as well as how I verbalize them. It has also shown me ways I can adjust some of the things I saw and do with regards to others.
I know a little heavier than I planned for a Monday check in. It just felt right to share some of my thoughts about this no scale and how it has affected me as I go into the final stretch of the 30 days without the scale.